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Location: Princeton area, New Jersey, United States

Just a college graduate stuck waitressing with a love of journaling.

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Valentines Day, Birthdays and Exhaustion

It's been way too long since I've written. I don't even think I've opened my computer in at least two days, probably a record for me other than when I've physically been separated from it by fairly long distances. I think about writing something almost every day, but then I look at my bed and I put off writing for another day because I'm so tired. Not that that's changed today, its just that its Sunday, therefore I got the whole night off.

This has been an unbelievably tiring week. Since my schedule sucks every week, I won't bore anyone with the details of it, but I will say that with two shifts left to go in our official work week (it goes from Tuesdays through Mondays), I'm already at almost 35.5 hours, meaning that they're either going to send me home tomorrow night or I'm going to go overtime. Honestly, at this point I think I'm too tired to care. I'm definitely feeling pretty apathetic right now. I barely have the energy to recount my birthday, which was largely uneventful save the $500 from my grandmother and the $1000 watch from Baume and Mercier that my parents gave me. It's gorgeous. When I'm not so tired I'll post a link to a picture of it. It's stainless steel and shiny all the way around, and the face is blue mother of pearl with diamonds where the numbers should be. I couldn't be happier with it, although at the moment I think I'd consider my life complete if someone handed me a beer and a cigarette.

And then there was Justin. How strange that he figured into my birthday. My family went out for dinner on my birthday at the restaurant that's right next door to where he works (the one where I saw him the last time...oh yeah, I saw him another time too, the week after the first time) and since I'm friends with the bartender there I decided to stop in to say hi after we were done with dinner. I thought Justin wasn't working. When I had seen him on Monday, I could swear he told Jess that he was off on Thursday night. So there I am, happy as a clam (because I had just eaten everything within my range of sight) walking into his restaurant. I'm about to open the door when I see Justin, standing at the host stand. If I could have managed it, I probably would have turned around. But he definitely would have noticed, considering he was looking right at me. So I put on a big smile, walked in and said hello. Here's where it gets weird. He seems happy to see me. Previously he had seemed totally indifferent to my presence on this earth. Whatever, there's no point in overanalyzing since the next thing he says is that he and Craig (the bartender I was telling you about) are going out later and would I like to come?

HUH? I sort of stumbled through it, said that I might be able to go out, told him it was my birthday, yadda yadda yadda. I firmed up the plans with Craig and met them out later in the evening. Does it seem weird that I didn't already have drinking plans in place on my birthday? Maybe, but I kinda figured I would just go out with people from work, and this thing with Justin literally just fell in my lap not ten minutes after I'd told my mom that I was gonna try to hang out with some people from work that night. Anyway, when I met them out later that night, Justin immediately turned his chair to talk to me and practically ignored the other people that he had come with (the staff from his place of work). When he left he gave me this big hug and wished me a happy birthday.

I sound obsessed with him. And for a while I was. And while I wouldn't necessarily say no to hooking up with him again (read: BIG ORGASM) and I definitely still think he 's hot (read: TO DIE FOR BLUE EYES), I'm largely over it. It's just weird because it was awkward seeing him before (as it should have been considering the fact that I had felt it necessary to leave him two lovely messages while drunk) and here he was asking me to come out with him. Whatev.

Last night I went to a party with people from work. It was fun but boy were there a lot of drugs there. It was mostly pot, but one girl was on shrooms and e, and I heard rumors that there was coke there. I don't do any drugs (minus the booze that is), but there weren't that many people there who didn't at least smoke up. Oh yeah, I think I have a crush on a guy. Name is Mike(#1). I work with him. He's just a big sweetie, but he's also just out of a relationship (with someone else from work) and I heard that another girl at work likes him. So the prospects are a tad on the dim side. Still, its okay because Mike's friend Mike(#2) (also someone I know, as he used to work with both Mike #1 and I) said that they have a mutual friend who would be perfect for me and invited me to the party that this kid is having in two weeks. Mike #1 said that the only thing bad that could be said about this guy would be that he's too nice.

Okay, all this typing is giving me a cramp and making me even more tired. As I still technically have two shifts to work tomorrow, I think I'm going to end this long, rambling, never-ending post. I congratulate anyone who actually go to the end of it.

posted by Lauren@ 9:28 PM


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