24 hours from now
24 hours from now I will either be doped up and passed out, or drunk and passed out, but not both. 24 hours from now I will also be about two hours away from landing at Heathrow airport for my trip to London. Why will I be doped up? Because I'm terrified of flying. I have Alprazolam (or something like that, its a dope me up and put me to sleep so I don't have a panic attack sort of drug, aka anti-anxiety) but I'm hoping not to have to take it since all the booze up in first class is free. There are also free manicures and massages that I would like to be awake to enjoy. But, if there's turbulence, and perhaps even if there's not (last time I flew I had knocked myself out with a small OD of the stuff before we even took off), or more accurately, perhaps before I even get to find out whether or not there's going to be turbulence, I may have to take some of the pills. Please, don't tell me that flying is less dangerous than driving. I know that.
Even more to the point, I get that the chance of my actually dying in a plane crash are slim to none.
But that's why they call it an irrational fear. If I could tell myself all those other things and not be afraid, then that would be rational. But something in my brain goes a little haywire when I start to inhale that pleasant recycled air smell that all planes so wonderfully provide us with. But anyway, I'm actually getting a little nervous just writing about this, which is something I want to keep myself from feeling like, so I'm gonna stop this.
I'm gonna try to post while I'm in London, but I might not be able to, especially if the rate for getting on the internet at the hotel is some ridiculous price. I am however, planning on keeping a diary of my trip, which I will post (and date correctly on the blog according to which day I wrote it) when I get back if I can't post at all while I'm there. So wish me a bon voyage and many safe and happy returns or some other sappy weirdo bullshit and I'll be happy. Although I really would be a whole lot happier
if I were one of the passengers on the QM2 or QE2, both of which left the NY Harbor last night en route to London. Oh well, ya can't have everything.